Monday, August 27, 2012

Meat Muffins


My attempt at making meatloaf muffins:

Ingredients:

Meat Muffin:

20 ounces of 80/20 ground beef.

12 Saltines

1 Large Egg

Mustard, Ketchup, Paprika, Worchestshire Sauce, Black Pepper, Oregano to flavor.

Sauce/Glaze:

4 ounces of ketchup

2 ounces of light brown sugar


Step 1: Preheat oven to 375.

Step 2: Utterly Destroy youyr 12 saltines, crush them until they are but remnants of their former selves. Or you know, just crush them up.

Step 3: Mix your meat, your soul dust of saltines (crushed saltines) the egg, and whatever else you like to flavor you meat together.

Step 4: Divide your meat equally into a cupcake/muffin pan. Mine divided evenly into 6 places.

Step 5: Mix your ketchup and brown sugar together by spoon, the glaze over top of your meat muffins.

Step 6: Place in oven for 30 minutes.

Step 7: Enjoy!

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Giving rites to the fallen - A Warcraft Inspired Short story

In a forest’s glen, not far from the crushing sounds of the sea against a nearby cliff, lie the remnants of a battlefield. Blood from wounds only minutes old sprinkles the snowy blanket that recently coated the surrounding area. Dozens of bodies litter the ground, their faces and dress all showing the signs of men and women who were prepared to die for their causes. Standing at the edge of the battlefield are three figures, a man and two women. Their weapons are still at the ready, and their attire sharply contrasts against those they have slain only moments before. One of the women is wrapped from head to toe in a cloak that seems a size too large. It is this woman who moves first, who kneels in front of one of the dead. The cloaked woman appears to stare at the remains of the man that lays butchered before her; his crimson tabard hiding the blood stains well, but not the wounds that caused them. He is not alone; a sprinkling of his cohorts lay nearby in similar poses of death. She speaks, not to the companions at her sides, but in actuality to no one at all.



Her voice is raspy and her words seem to make the air colder than it already is. "So far the mighty have fallen from grace. What once was a great man serving a great order is now just carrion for the scavengers."



The two at her flanks both seem to recoil a little as the woman bends over the corpse, her bony almost clawed hands sliding out of her cloak and gently caressing the face of the deceased man. The tall, thin Elfin man on her left brushes a few loose strands of his silver hair back behind his ear and quickly turns his head slightly towards the troll on her right.



"She is doing it again, isn't she Ny? I hate it when she does this."



The fiery haired troll gives the elf a small smile, her lips spreading just far enough apart to show more than a little of her razor sharp teeth. The grin quickly fades as she watches what she knows will now come to pass.



The bone-handed woman does not seem to acknowledge the elf’s words as she speaks again. "May the light you tried to serve so hard in this life guide you in the next." Her hand slowly slides down the deceased man's face and chest until stopping over his heart, her fingers spreading out and pressing hard against his chest. "For as long as there is light in this world to protect the living, there shall also forever be a shadow cast over the dead."



A dark green light seems to glow within the chest of the deceased, spilling out from the wounds in his body. The body rapidly begins to change, first its teeth and jaw growing many times larger than the rest of the face. Next, the flesh seems to rot weeks in a length of time only slightly longer then a moment. This newly created creature immediately stands up and stares obediently at his creator, patiently waiting to be commanded by his master.



As she finishes her ritual she speaks one last time, "And it is that shadow that shall serve me now until the day I die again." She lets her cloak flow freely in the cold blowing air as her raven hair and long dead face are seemingly rejuvenated by the cold. She then turns her soulless icy blue eyes towards the gates of the Keep atop the cliff in the distance. "Come my friends, we have some funerals to arrange."



The group starts to leave the glen, the undead woman leaving last. She stares over her shoulder at that which they had wrought, and she seems somewhat saddened and almost reluctant to leave. She waves her hand in an arcane gesture, and turns away, leaving the forest as little more than a memory. Slowly, with nothing but the silence of the departed to welcome it, snow begins to fall again. Within a few minutes, all signs of the battle are buried by the snow.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Buffalo Chicken Dip


More pictures to be added when it is properly served later tonight at a party.

What you will need:

1 lb of chicken.
16 ounces of ranch dressing (optional, if you like Blue cheese substitute out 8 ounces of ranch for blue cheese, do not make a complete substitution)
16 Ounces of Cream Cheese
8 Ounces of Buffalo Hot Sauce
1-2 ounces of "HOT!" Hot Sauce.

Step 1: Boil Chicken for 30 minutes on high. If your chicken is frozen, make this 1 hour.

Step 2: Shred chicken thoroughly with a fork.

Step 3: Mix together shreded chicken with all other ingredients except for the 1-2 ounces of HOT Sauce.

Step 4: Spread out in a caserole dish or similar safe to bake dish. Sprinkle your HOT sauce directly on top.

Step 5: Refrigerate until ready to serve.

Step 6: Bake for 30 minutes at 350* or until the dip starts to bubble.

Step 7: Let cool 10 minutes before serving.

Step 8: Enjoy!

Saturday, June 9, 2012

Avocado Ranch Dip (With Hints of Lime)



Avocado Ranch Dip



Going to a party tomorrow and someone there will be a vegetarian, so in addition to my Buffalo Chicken Dip (which I'll be making and writing up tomorrow ) I decided to make a vegetarian alternative for those craving dip.

This is a great dip that can be made in under 5 minutes and is perfect for any gathering, be it a cast party or a D&D group meetup. It's great for even an amateur cook.

Avocado Ranch Dip

16 oz container of sour cream
2 Large Avocados
2 ounces of sweetened lime juice
1 oz packet of ranch seasoning mix

Optional:
Ground black pepper
Lime or Lemon based liquor


Step 1: Peel, De seed, and mash up the Avocados.

Step 2: Mix the avocados (which is now guacamole) with sour cream and your lime juice (and optional liquor)

Step 3: Mix in the ground black pepper (Optional, I use around a tbsp in mine) and ranch seasoning mix.

Step 4: Place in a resealable container (I use things like old cool whip containers)

Step 5: Chill in fridge until you are ready to serve.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Adverb Bread: Peanut Butter Honey Chocolate Cinnamon Banana Bread




This is what happens when I get bored and hungry at once.

Ingredients:

3 Bananas, the riper the better
3 Eggs
2 Cups All Purpose Flour
1 Cup White Granulated Sugar
1/2 Cup Peanut Butter
1/2 Cup Honey
1/2 Cup Butter, softened/melted.
1/2 Cup Vegetable Oil
1/4 Cup Unsweetened Chocolate Powder
1/8th cup Cinnamon
1 tbsp baking soda
1 tbsp baking powder
1 tsp salt

Step 1: Preheat Over to 325 Degrees.

Step 2: Mix Together All ingredients except flour.

Step 3: Mix in flour, if you wanted to add nuts, this would be the time.

Step 4: Place in baking pan.

Step 5: Place in oven for 50-70 minutes, or until a toothpick or butter knife inserted comes out clean.

Step 6: Let sit 10 minutes before attempting to remove from pan and to let cool.


I would suggest serving with a glass of milk, as anything chocolatey should be served with a glass of milk.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Bacon and Egg "Cupcakes"

Okay, for my first post I'm going to post my most recent attempt in the kitchen and how I accomplished it.



What you will need (per cupcake):

Estimated time from start to finish: ~20 minutes

1 strip of bacon.
1 egg
1 slice of bread


Salt and pepper.


Cheese (optional)
Sliced Peppers (optional)

Step 1: Preheat over to 400 degrees. This isnt a hard recipe so you want to do mthis right away.

Step 2: Grease up a cupcake tray.

Step 3: Using the method of your choice, precook the bacon half way, either throw it on the grill for a minute, or toss it in the microwave for half the suggested time.

Step 4: (this step can easily be done while waiting for the bacon to partially cook): Take each slice of bread and press a large cup onto it to get a circular slice of bread. Alternatively, if you have enough common sense or fore sight, use a large sugar cookie cutter (better planner then me).

Step 5: Gently press each slice of bread into the cupcake holder.

Step 6: Place the bacon against the edges of cupcake pan edges, this combined with the bread makes your cupcake "wrapper".

Step 7: This is where you would add a small amount of cheese, pepper slices or whatever you want, by placing it inside the "wrapper"

Step 8: Crack open the egg and place inside the "wrapper".  (The egg, not the shell)

Step 9: Apply salt and pepper to taste place in oven for 10-15 minutes depending on desired consistency of egg.

Step 10: Pull out, let sit for 2-3 minutes and removed your new cupcakes with a butter knife or toothpick.

Enjoy!


Note for those on weight watchers: Without adding anything optional, each cupcake can easily be made at 4 pts+ if using a weight watchers bread as your base.